Well Then, last time I wrote I was feeling impatient out of control, which I really hate [10 points]. I was on a holiday stress spiral.
The holidays where looming over my head. Yes I know, they are about family and spending time together and love and happiness – yada yada yada. I get that. Most years I’m on board with that.
This year however, I was feeling more anxiety than anything. Sometimes you have an off Christmas. Sometimes people just don’t like it at all. The older you get the more like work holidays become.
So there I was, stressed to shit with not even a drop of snow to get me feeling festive and off I went back home.
Ready To Eat all the Fucking Stuffing
I am quite happy to say things turned out much better than I expected. My Mama is officially on board with me in my eating clean journey. I was so happy to come home to a Christmas Eve dinner that consisted of free range chicken, gluten-free stuffing, dairy free mashed potatoes and a yummy greek salad (like legit greek salad. No lettuce in that B) OH! And she even made a gluten-free apple pie (which I murdered) that she sweetened with coconut sugar instead of refined. YUM
So Christmas was off to a relatively good start. I knew while making the rounds with some of my family that it wouldn’t be quite so catered but it was Christmas. You gotta give a little. I personally feel there’s no sense in pushing my personal health agenda down the throats of my family. Why not just enjoy the time.
So I made an agreement with myself that I would not deprive myself of my aunts creamy mashed potatoes and gravy but I would just take a bit and that I wouldn’t stuff myself beyond belief.
Truth:I’ve had a legit intolerance to diary since birth. Now that diary has been cut out of my life almost completely, I feel it straight away even when I have a little. So my idea to moderate myself kiiinda worked…but after about 30 mins I could feel the pain and bloating kick in.
Needless to say, that was the beginning of the end over the next two days in terms of my healthy eating regime.
I had already broke through with creamy mash and gravy…then I went to stay at my friend’s house. We’ve been friends since grade 6 and she’s like family to me…and she made lobster mac and cheese. Tell me, after already breaking the dairy rule, that I wasn’t gonna eat that mac and cheese?! Hells to the No – I defiantly was. There was no question in my mind and I tell you now it was amazballs!
Of course I seriously suffered from the 25th-27th…but it was in the name of Christmas!
On the 27th my best friend and I went to visit my girl Miss M. She’s 12 and I’m kind of mentoring her. I’m not going to give too many details on her aside from that fact that she’s a little fashionista and we are friends before I’m her mentor. Or at least that’s how I feel.
Her parents are on board with the living clean goal and made us an incredible lunch that was kind of just what my body needed. Light and full of good things that made my tummy happy.
I was home for 5 days. Out of those five days I cheated pretty severely 2 of those days…not bad at all I’m thinking. The beauty of it all is that it’s just really motivated me to get back on track right away.
Segway to my Announcement:
Well Then is a new endeavour for me. At this time it’s a lot of journaling my feelings and experiences but I want to mix the format up a bit and try new things that can really engage people in internet land who might come across it. Everyone who knows me knows I’m a Pinterest fiend. It’s my source of inspiration for almost everything. If you’re a Pinterest junkie like me you know about a bajillion DIY projects on everything from home decor to detoxing.
So in the upcoming days, weeks, whatever I’m going to be adding posts about my experiences with some of these DIYs from other health blogs online as well as some new stuff that I’m looking into 🙂
All in all I’m happy to say that the gloomy x-mas cloud that was looming over my head has finaaaaalllly lifted and I’m seriously looking forward to a healthy and fit 2015!
I can’t even tell you how incredibly unmotivated I have been the last few weeks!
Not only did I discover that I’ve been doing a lot of my “health” stuff all wrong but once I realized, I had a temper tantrum, said fuck it and just gave up for bit. I could (and probably will) write a post just on this discovery alone but right now it seems like too tangled a web to unweave.
Then there’s Christmas…don’t even get me started on Christmas this year.
Usually I go mad Martha up in this bitch around the Holiday season. I love christmas. I bake pies, I make things for people and I love going shopping and picking out the perfect gift for my loved ones…Christmas is usually my jam and the best part about the winter.
Ha! Well not this year. For the first time in my life I felt like a grumbly adult. The stores are too unorganized, everybody is crowding and shoving…WHY ARE THERE SO MANY PEOPLE?! Why can’t I breathe?! What do I buy these people? I’m so tired of all this stuff. Everybody is just so obsessed with stuff!
Mad mental drama that is barreling out of control.
It’s really quite amazing to me the as fun and magical as the Holiday season can be, it’ has this ability to knock you flat on your ass and make a person fester in worry.
God damn, I was doing really well for a while but, just like every year around this time, I let the winter blues take me over and I am left feeling helpless (which is even worse when you know you are NEVER really helpless) cranky and kind of cold. So generally low energy, lazy and lethargic.
I swear, at some point my goal with this blog is to offer positive solutions to beat this kind of behaviour. However, as it stands right now I’m in the same boat with everyone else who is having this problem.
Tonight I’m going home for the holidays and seriously debating if I should even try to be healthy or just forget about it and eat my weight in stuffing….mmmmm stuffing…
Straight up – I am a Convert to These Mysteries we call Fitness, Health and Wellness.
I grew up always feeling at odds…with pretty much everything. What can I say? It’s a classic story. I was the tall, kinda-curvy-for-my-age kid with the only unmarried parents in my Catholic school. I’m not gonna get into a big mushy rant about it but basically life wasn’t exactly normal…ever.
Ha! When I switched schools in grade 3, there were rumours that I had been held back a couple grades. Boys used to call me Green Giant. Ya, after the dude on the can of beans. I shit you not. Without knowing or understanding, I had a mad body image complex very early on. This is a complex I’ve struggled with for most of my life.
It’s been so much more than a struggle to loose weight or feel comfortable in a pair of heels. It’s been a fight against an image and ideas that were forced on me. If you do these things and become these things, life will get easier and people will like you. To be honest, that was always the problem. Those ideas were always forced on me, which really pissed me off even before I really understood what being pissed off meant.
Now in my late 20’s fitness and health have become HUGE priorities in my life. So much so that I am completely shifting my lifestyle. Part of me feels like I didn’t have to go through that metal battle – if I had just listened to what people told me to do from the beginning I would have gotten to this place sooner. This is of course total bull.
The truth is, I always shied away from fitness because of the convoluted messages that sometimes surround the industry. Luckily now we are in a “wellness revolution”. Currently, it can be about a lot more than just getting jacked. It’s about over all optimal health. Unfortunatly growing up, it was all about getting fit to look fit, playing sports to be competitive and look fit. Be a show off. Blah blah blah – Look at this jacked-ness… Bleh!
And to be honest, that’s never really been my style.
So What’s the Point Already?!
My goal with this blog is to chronicle my journey from complete novice to an expert. I’m hoping that I can bridge the worlds of fitness and wellness in a new way. Let’s break the traditional ideas of what it means to be “fit” and really break it down to what works best for an individual.
I’d like to encourage women to approach fitness and health as a means of completely embracing themselves on a genuine mind, body, spirit level…obviously with squats because everyone wants an ass you could crush something with 😉
Future Chit Chats:
My personal journey through a 3 month fitness challenge (which starts in and hour…ek!)
Food and vitamin musings – Interesting things I’m learning about the stuff we put in our bodies
Curvy Girl Fit – Getting toned and keeping those curves
Herbals – Herbs are so cool…you really have no idea…they fix everything yo
Embracing the power – examining the shifts you feel with yourself on all levels when you make a life style change
Thanks for reading and keep an eye out for my next post where I will rant about how much my ass hurts from the class I’m about to take.