I can’t even tell you how incredibly unmotivated I have been the last few weeks!
Not only did I discover that I’ve been doing a lot of my “health” stuff all wrong but once I realized, I had a temper tantrum, said fuck it and just gave up for bit. I could (and probably will) write a post just on this discovery alone but right now it seems like too tangled a web to unweave.
Then there’s Christmas…don’t even get me started on Christmas this year.
Usually I go mad Martha up in this bitch around the Holiday season. I love christmas. I bake pies, I make things for people and I love going shopping and picking out the perfect gift for my loved ones…Christmas is usually my jam and the best part about the winter.
Ha! Well not this year. For the first time in my life I felt like a grumbly adult. The stores are too unorganized, everybody is crowding and shoving…WHY ARE THERE SO MANY PEOPLE?! Why can’t I breathe?! What do I buy these people? I’m so tired of all this stuff. Everybody is just so obsessed with stuff!
Mad mental drama that is barreling out of control.
It’s really quite amazing to me the as fun and magical as the Holiday season can be, it’ has this ability to knock you flat on your ass and make a person fester in worry.
God damn, I was doing really well for a while but, just like every year around this time, I let the winter blues take me over and I am left feeling helpless (which is even worse when you know you are NEVER really helpless) cranky and kind of cold. So generally low energy, lazy and lethargic.
I swear, at some point my goal with this blog is to offer positive solutions to beat this kind of behaviour. However, as it stands right now I’m in the same boat with everyone else who is having this problem.
Tonight I’m going home for the holidays and seriously debating if I should even try to be healthy or just forget about it and eat my weight in stuffing….mmmmm stuffing…